Page 2 updated on Oct.31, 2020
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The fun continues here...send in your tales of woe, revenge, love lost, whatever you want the world to see. Get back at your least favorite instructors by emailing Mary O'Neill at [email protected] 
It appears that one of your dedicated Organizers, whose name shall not be mentioned has intimated that some stories appear to take on new life and extra details as the years go by. Not having been there, yours truly can only dutifully place a Truth Meter on these FUN pages.--Mary O. |
Ready for some more? Read on...
Commander Ducat by Vince Barra
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Second Class cruise. We took 3 day trip from port of Genoa to Roma. Group of us, members of infamous "2 H" brigade took Rome by storm. Out past curfew, in civies, at Fountain of Trevi until 1 am. Bob Thompson playing guitar with Romans on mandolins at Trevi Fountain.
They got us a ride back to our hotel on a tour bus. Who was sitting in back of bus but Cmdr. Ducat! Next was Captain's Mast. We all got 25 demerits and restricted in next port of Rotterdam. "2H" vowed revenge on Cmdr. Ducat. On first class cruise on way home after passing Gibraltar, Pete Finnerty came into our room at 5 am. Pete had Ducat's Navy Destroyer Captain's jacket that Ducat was sooo proud of. We all decided to deep six it over the fantail. Pete was on watch so he got the position off the charts of where the jacket found its final resting place. Maggy's Drawers was "2 H" symbol of defiance. After receiving our diplomas on graduation day, I hoisted Maggy's Drawers up the flagpole. Cmdr. Ducat came to inquire about our "flag" and to congratulate us. We told him that we had something to present to him. I think he expected some sort of honorarium. We presented a chart to him with location of the final resting place of his Destroyer Captain's Jacket. The look on his face was priceless!!! Our final revenge. 
Click to enlarge
The Maggie's Drawers photos were supplied by Joy with this explanation:
"So, this means the pictures are from movie camera, to 8mm tape, to video tape, to tv, to camera, to computer!!!" |
Good Ole Captain Spring!
As a First Classman, I was Captain of the basketball team. One weekend we had traveled up state New York to play games on Friday night and Sunday afternoon. On the way back to the Fort on Sunday evening we stopped at the "Hot Shop" on the Thruway for something to eat.
We had a couple of cars and drivers, one of which was our dear friend Captain A.J. Spring. On Monday at the 0800 muster there was an announcement "Cadet Ryznar 1/c report to Capt. Spring. Of course my first reaction was "What did I do now". On reporting to Capt. Spring I was "ordered" to put Cadet Travis McIntosh 2/c on report. My response was "For what....... Sir"? |
by Ed. Ryznar
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Spring replied that McIntosh went into the "Hot Shop" uncovered.
My reply was "You have got to be kidding". This really pissed Spring off. I further told Spring that "I could not put McIntosh on report as I did not see him and come on Capt. he is our starting forward". Spring then informed me that I had two (2) choices - 1. put McIntosh on report for 5 demerits (which was nothing) or 2. Spring would put me on report for 15 demerits for "failure to obey a direct order". Needless to say I took the 15 shot and lost three (3) weekends. The following Saturday night many of my teammates delivered beer to my room. Boing Boing was something else............ 
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From Bill Steffenhagen
Classic Maritime – at our 10 year reunion
Phil Lund streaked the dinner dance. Others hid his clothes. So after the streaking thing was over and unable to find his clothes, a totally unperturbed Phil donned a dinner napkin around his waist and commenced dancing. Quite a contrast, a dance partner in formal wear and Phil in a dinner napkin. If it was possible to have a bottom line to this story, it might be that Phil can no longer make claims to robustness. 
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Charlie Rey
I was on a 1600-to-2000 watch one evening when watch officer Kvalheim had a wild hair. He sent the messenger up to Charlie Rey to get a copy of the dinner menu. The messenger came back to report that this was a ridiculous request as there was no such thing as a dinner menu. Then Kvalheim went to the boiler and turned off the galley steam. About 20 minutes later a gook came down to the engine room with a hand-written dinner menu.
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Charlie Rey was coming to work one day on the Cross Bronx Expressway when he got a flat. He pulled over to change the tire. After a while he heard some noise in the back of the car. He went to investigate and found someone removing a rear tire. Asking, what do you think you’re doing? The fellow replied, don’t be greedy, you take the front tires and I’ll take the back tires. Yes, life in NYC.
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We all remember our Mug Cruise - a 21- day crossing with a major 4-day long storm. Even the professional seamen made trips down the shaft alley to dump their cookies. I was on a 1200 to 1600 watch on the operating deck of the engine room when the first classman came over to me and asked if I was alright. I had just observed a 29 degree list on the inclinometer but assured the upper classman that I was fine. He advised me that just in case I got sick, to pull the dixie cup had from my waistband and catch the toss.
A while later, I pulled the cap from my waistband and made a credible catch. What seemed like a good idea only lasted several minutes as the cap then acted more like a filter – pretty messy. Everyone on the operating deck gave me plenty of space. After a few moments, the upper classman came over to check on me. He asked if I was alright, stuck a couple of rags in my hand and told me to clean things up. When we arrived in Southampton after the 21-day crossing, my roommate Harry Carter and I went out for some good food. We had sirloin steaks for lunch and T-bone steaks for dinner. After dinner we learned that Scotch whisky was only $0.28 a shot. I was never one for hard liquor, but what the heck – the price was right. So, we started out with doubles, and from there went to triple shots. Well, it was a bit of a miracle that we ever got back to the ship. Needless to say, I tossed those steaks and more. |
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Play Ball!Probably the best baseball game I recall was in 1962 at Kings Point. It was a 14 inning marathon. We would score a run in the top of the inning and KP would come back and tie the game in the bottom of the inning.
Vinnie Montanya pitched all 14 innings – a testament to his endurance, something totally unheard of by today’s standards (also a testament of RR’s coaching skills). We ended up losing that game in the bottom of the 14th. The next year at home we handily beat KP. Vinnie pitched 7 innings and Don Johnson came on for the closing. I had the pleasure of playing with several good college level ballplayers, but without a doubt Vinnie Montani was the only major league prospect. |
Albany- First Class Cruise
My roommates, Buddy Rosar, Stan Pobutkiewicz, and
Harry Carter, and I enjoyed our suds but were cash poor. So we decided to go to the Schaefer Brewery in Albany and try for some complimentary brew. When we got to the brewery gate, we asked the security guard to beckon the shift supervisor for our brewery tour. When the shift supervisor arrived we gave him our concocted story that it was posted on-board ship that there was to be a brewery tour. The shift supervisor checked his ledger and explained the he had no knowledge of a tour. Looking at our troubled and disappointed faces he then said, I’ll tell you what, I’ll take you fellas on the tour and if anyone else shows up, they will be turned away. That seemed fair to us, so off we went. |
After an abbreviated tour, the staffer brought us to the hospitality room (not the public well-heeled hospitality room, but the sparsely furnished employee break room. He explained that after employees completed their shift, they were free to relax and enjoy all the brew they wanted in this room. He told us to enjoy ourselves and to stay as long as we liked.
Several hours later when the shift supervisor was making his rounds, he stopped into the employee break room and was surprised that we were still there. We sure enjoyed the free brew and got along great with the employees. Where there is a will, there is a way. 
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by Bill Steffenhagen
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Also by Bill Steffenhagen
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This is a true and unembellished story – the names have been changed to protect the innocent.
Character # 1 - innocent country boy (ICB) Character #2 - worldly and vindictive city boy (WVCB) Ah yes Lisbon. The morning after our arrival at Lisbon, there was a long line at the dispensary for penicillin. If the individual used a condom he was administered a penicillin pill, if not he was given a penicillin shot in the derriere. After a while the Doc in frustration asked an upperclassman why he didn’t use a condom. The upper classman indignantly responded that he was a Catholic. One can only conjecture that it was at this point that the Jewish Doc started winding up in administering the penicillin shots. This is in way of background for the story This same morning I passed ICB in the passageway and said hello. In return I got nothing but an angry grunt. So I turned around in an attempt to determine the problem. What I observed was a half-dollar size red spot on the derriere of ICB’s white’s. This led me to want to find out what happened to ICB. So I asked around and was told that I should check with WVCB for an explanation. So WVCB was ICB’s roommate and when ICB return from shore leave the night before he was very morose. Being the good roomy WVCB consoled ICB. It turns out that ICB was seduced by one of the ladies of the night and was feeling guilty, unfaithful, and very concerned about VD. After some comforting words, WVCB explained that there was only one way to determine if ICB had contracted VD. You have to take a shower, the water has to be as hot as you can physically stand, and you have to suds up really well. Immediately after coming out of the shower, you have to generously splash after shave lotion on your private parts. If it burns, you definitely have VD. So off to the community showers goes ICB. In the meantime WVCB gathers up everyone available on E Deck to gather around the showers. When the shower was complete and the aftershave lotion applied, a horrendous cry of anguish came from the showers, followed by an enthusiastic cheer from those gathered in the hallway. And so ended the initiation of ICB. 
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Photo courtesy of the Stephen B. Luce Library
by Porthole Editor 1962
Want to revisit these stories? Do a search for The Epic of Ford O'Schuler on http://www.sunymaritime.edu/stephenblucelibrary/porthole.html They're all there! |
From Eric Aanestad
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It was great fun playing in the Maritime College Band. We got to perform at many great venues, including St.Patrick's Day Parades in New York, New York Giants football game at Yankee Stadium, and other venues in Europe including Tivoli Gardens in Copenhagen. Our band had a unique sound. It was not be confused with the New York Philharmonic Orchestra. Our sound was so unique that it was recognizable in Europe. It was in Malaga, Spain. We marched into a bull ring in Malaga playing. It was hard to see because it was a hot summer day and the sun was blinding. Nick Esposito was sitting in the stands when we marched in. Because of the heat and the blinding sun(and possibly a beer), Nick said he couldn't see anything. But he said he heard a sound that could be only one thing-The Maritime College Band!!!!!! Recognition on the European Continent. Great!!!!! I always wondered why we were not invited to play at Lincoln Center. |
The Time Harry Stoehr Got a "-5 "on an Exam
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by Eric Aanestad
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From Don White
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When we were first classmen, I sent a Mug into the kitchen to ask Charlie his secret for making such fine stone-hard biscuits. A few minutes later, the Mug returned to our table escorted by Charlie. Charlie asked who had sent the Mug into the kitchen. I admitted that I had. He then answered the question. His secret ingredient was “age”. |
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And then in some city (don’t really remember) Frank Giaccio, I and some others dropped pants and did a circle moon of the city. I think we did that in a number of places...sort of like a tradition. God bless Frank. I see he won’t be joining us and will be missed. We had a lot of fun. 
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So there we were at lunch in the mess hall either 4th or 3rd class year. The meal...HOT DOGS! We loved hot dogs. When I say “we” I really mean to say Joe Diodati, the king of all hot dog eaters. On this particular day Joe decided on his own (or was prodded) to see how many dogs could be consumed at one sitting. He ate not 6, not 10, not 14......but 18 dogs! That’s my memory.
Speaking of mooning, there were a couple of asses hanging out train windows as we pulled into Rome. I can confirm this story.
Or Gene McDonald’s speech on the fantail. (see below and on page 46 in the yearbook) |
How about Wallo in Naples when he sold a carton of cigs to some Italians and ended up with an envelope filled with paper after a switcheroo. He then dedicated himself to taking revenge by filling an empty carton with balsa wood (or some other material) of the same weight and then selling that carton for real money. He high-tailed it back to the ship never to go ashore in Naples again out of fear that his fingers (or some other body part) would be surgically removed. |
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Moe and Joyce, the girls who used to hang out at the Vous (Bill York would remember, as would Villella but we probably won’t see him at the reunion). Moe had a big gap in her teeth but she was hot in a strange sort of way.
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The trip to Fatima and a lot of wine on the bus. Lunch at a nunnery with novitiates serving and us thinking bad thoughts.
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Speaking of Lisbon, it turned out that my parents were on a tour to Europe the same summer we were in Lisbon. They also visited Lisbon and thought it was one of the most beautiful cities visited on their tour. They couldn’t understand why I thought the city was dirty and ugly, but that’s because they didn’t know that except for the trip to Fatima I didn’t get more than two blocks from the ship. You remember...the Dixie Bar, the California Bar, the New York Bar.......
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Meeting a girl in Albany on our last cruise, making out after about 30 minutes, and promising to keep in touch. The way this story unfolded is interesting. Three of us were in a bar, and the place was empty. Suddenly, three girls walk through the door, look around, and leave thinking “No action here.” We leap from our stools and run outside just as they were about to pull away from the curb.
We bang on the window and, believe it or not, they invite us to pile into the car for a ride to a dance hall. I latch on to one of the girls (very pretty) at the dance hall and, literally, after about three slow dances we started making out on the dance floor. Eventually, they returned us to the ship where we did a little more kissy-face before boarding. The girl I was with wrote me about a dozen letters which arrived in Dublin (I think that was our first port that year after Albany). In several of the letters she expressed exasperation over the fact that she had not heard from me (we were at sea, honey). I saved the letters for a couple of years and then tossed them. Never did make it back to Albany. Nice port, though. Hard to believe she is probably in her very late 60s. Wonder what she looks like (that thought takes the edge off). Speaking of Albany, there we were on the Empire State sailing up the Hudson past NYC in the morning “blowing tubes.” I think we got a hefty fine for that incident.
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The nukes getting screwed out of the trip to Paris from Antwerp because Degani made other arrangements for us to visit a nuclear research facility. We were on the fantail when the buses returned from Paris with arms holding panties hanging out the windows. Our disappointment defies description. |
The fact that after being the Chief Engineering IDO and the 2nd Division Head on our last cruise, and contrary to tradition, I ended up a foot soldier our 1st Class year (but who’s complaining?). Wonder why that happened and why I didn’t get offered a commission. Really pissed me off. sort of. |
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One of the reasons I ended up a foot soldier might have been an incident with Harry Clark on the cruise. He sent a kid “up” to me with a question. I sent the kid “down” to him with an answer. The kid came back to me and said Cmdr. Clark wanted to see me. Clark’s words to me were “I send a messenger up to you. You don’t send a messenger down to me! You report in person.” Yeah, I guess that might have contributed to me ending up a foot soldier.
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Then there is the fact that when I was captain of the golf team some of the traveling money got converted to beer and I thought Spring was going to find out before graduation (that would have been a bummer). Is he still alive?
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Finding out the first day that we would not be in two-man rooms with desks just like normal college people. I considered myself to be lucky; I was in a ten-man room with a bunch of Ls and Ms (only five of us graduated).
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I will never forget Dave Penn, a company commander our Mug year, telling us when we were first assigned to his company after indoctrination to “Line up alphabetically by height.” We looked like chickens with their heads cut off as we attempted to implement his command. |
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From Gene McDonald |
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Maritime Day May 1962 - I played Tuba in the band and after sweltering in formation in the Skating Rink at Rockefeller Center we had liberty. I put my Tuba in its case and stowed it under the bus in the storage compartment. Had a great time in NYC and made it back in time. At band practice the next day I went for the Tuba and it wasn't there. OOPS!!! I get put on report for losing the tuba. Lose some priviliges in our first port and worked in the "rose box" to get double hours. On return for our 2nd class year I get kicked off the band for 1/2 year.
Fast forward to Maritime Day 1963, I'm playing a Sousaphone, have liberty and go about stowing my instrument under the bus and lo and behold what's there - my Tuba from last year. It was never taken off the bus. For 1st class year I played the Cymbals!! |
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Another story on me. I played on the Basketball team. We had not been very good but our 2nd Class year we looked like we might get to win a game. Clint Hunt and I rigged up a banner we ran through at our first home game. We were pumped. We were playing the SUNY team that had come in first the prior year. We were ahead mid way through the second half and I was getting tired. I asked Rog Reinhart to give me a rest. He said no and I let my guy score a few points that I felt lost us the game.
In the locker room afterwards I went ballistic kicking the lockers and cursing out Rog. Sixty demerits and off the team for two months and lost my starting position. Plus I got another 20 d's for yelling out "Boing!" when Capt. Spring walked in to a game when I was in the stands. How he knew it was me I'll never know. |
"Moon Over Haverstraw"
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Darryl Zdenek told all his relatives (and us unfortunately for him) the approximate time that we would pass Haverstraw on the Hudson River with the training ship and that he would be on the aft part of the ship waving a white towel. It was wonderful to see so many of his relatives all waving white towels and looking at him in binoculars. As Darryl stood at the rail waving, he failed to notice that behind him on the cargo hatch elevated about 3 feet higher than he stood, were at least 10 or more cadets with their pants down saluting his relatives, thus Moon over Haverstraw. |
"The Speech"
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The reason for this speech, as narrated by Jack O'Neill:
"At the end of each cruise, the First Class would 'roast' the Officers, Instructors and Administrators as a means to have fun as well as to let off steam. In 1963, the Administration put restrictions in place as to what we could say." 
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The second story also involves Dr. Degani and this same class, Applied Differential Equations. Dr. Degani had a Socratic style of teaching. You had to have at least two entries for class participation in his class ledger. At the beginning of each class, he would call on a cadet to stand next to his seat, close all reference notes and prepare to get grilled on the materials of the previous class and the assigned homework problems. If you survived the grilling you got a mark, a black dot, next to your name in the ledger, meaning you had a good chance at passing the course. Dr. Degani, born in Poland, had emigrated to the United States via Palestine (now Israel) and had in addition to his Polish accent, a slight lisp. The incident occurred toward the end of the semester and centered around the topic of Bessel functions, a rather difficult mathematical topic dealing with wave forms, etc. Now there were three Mc's in the class, McMurray, McMullen, McIntyre. On this particular morning, Dr. Degani started the class by saying, “This morning I would like to speak with Mr. Mc..., Mr. Mc..., Mr. Mc (his lisp kicked in and he could not get the rest of the name out). The three of us looked at each other with the fear of death at hand, when we heard him clearly say, Mr. Schwartz. The three of us Mc's nearly fainted with laughter while Walt Schwartz twisted and turned in an agonizing death trying to describe the practical application of Bessel functions. |
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